THE 4 STEP EMOTIONAL ACCEPTANCE PROCESS

Most of us never really learn how to embrace our emotions in ways that will serve

ourselves and others.

Emotions are our Soul’s way of communicating to us. Here is a very simple four step process that will allow your emotions to flow through you and leave traces of wisdom, like nuggets of gold at the bottom of the river, that will enrich your life:

1. Allow yourself to thoroughly experience the raw emotion itself. Begin by feeling it physically, truly embody that emotion and allow it to be expressed through you. What sound does it want to make? What movement, posture or gesture do you feel best describes it? Don’t censor it and don’t add to your Shadow Self, instead, allow it to arise and come out in its most raw form.
2. What is the emotion trying to tell you? After you’ve embodied and expressed it, you can now explore, without any self-judgement, what exactly that emotion is trying to tell you about yourself; your values, beliefs, needs, desires, expectations, attitudes, etc.
3. How can you behave according to this emotion’s message? Once you’ve expressed and explored the emotion, you can begin acting based on what you’ve learned from this emotion. Is there anything you can do to bring balance to the world again (e.g. forgiving a person that let you down or learning to be more assertive), or is there a way you can share your emotion with others and celebrate the joy you feel?
4. After the emotion has been expressed, explored and understood, you can then assimilate it. Assimilation of an emotion is a slow process that will only be realized in hindsight. Only once the emotional dust has settled can you truly learn the value the emotion brought into our life.

We are often criticized for expressing our emotions and feel guilty or uncomfortable when feeling strong sensations, but emotions are vital parts of life. I have dealt with countless people who have asked me, “Why am I so emotional … what’s wrong with me,” and the answer is always “nothing!” It is normal to experience many emotions, but it is abnormal to suppress them or pretend they don’t exist. It is also harmful to indulge in emotional drama without paying attention to the hidden messages encapsulated in each emotion.
When we can apply self-inquiry to our emotions, we find that feelings add another piece to our inner puzzle and journey towards a more whole and authentic self.
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