The reality was somewhat different. At least for my kid. Strong spirited and easily distracted,
he got lost. When there was no consequence for not showing up, he didn’t show up. When there was no reward for attention, he didn’t give it. When there was no structure, he was not present. That day I arrived at the school unexpectedly. He was lying out in the yard, calm and yet strangely disengaged. I asked him what he was doing. He said, just hanging out. But he was alone and kind of sad.
What class do you have now? Oh, I’m not sure, he said, it’s okay, I’m allowed be here. It was the sadness that got me. He was 8 years old and lost. That’s when we decided it was time.
To get him in a clear structure and framework, within which he would find himself and we would find him again.
Now this is not about an argument for what educational system is more effective, in my experience, they all have flaws.
Nor is it a reflection on this generation or the plague of distraction and attention deficit disorder that seems to have taken over.
It’s simpler than that, it’s about structure. And frameworks. It’s about finding what works for you.
You see, this has been my experience too.
Ever since I started my business I’ve been aware that I have pretty good discipline. I’m not tempted to watch daytime TV or to procrastinate too much.
And yet, I see that when I create strong structures for my business and relating to my focus and attention, I am 1000% more effective, productive and successful.
There are two particular structures I’ve created that are critical to my ability to run my business and be successful:
- I used to work in the ‘spare room’. Realistically it was the dumping ground for the whole family, for school bags, boxes and junk. I would clear my space and slowly it was contract around me until I could barely move, then I’d clear again. Now I work in my dedicated home office, it’s gorgeous, organized and mine. The energy is perfect there, it makes all the difference.
- Creating the network of mentors, coaches and colleagues that I can check in with when I need support - both formally and informally. I have always understood that to be successful, I need to invest in myself and develop my skills, network and sphere of influence. It doesn’t happen by chance, you need to create this.
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